This is a test...this is a test...I will pass this test...I will pass this test...This is what I keep telling myself anyways.
As most of you know, my little man turned 3 years old this past Sunday. Sometime around 5 pm that evening, my little man, disappeared...not physically, mind you, but someone or something has taken over his body that must be from another planet. I wrote a post on Monday about how that day had started(I don't kiss butts) and believe me that was just the beginning of this downward spiral.
Since then our days have been filled with throwing ourselves on the ground, hitting & choking his sister(she will be 2 in 2 months) and throwing her down on the ground , hitting other kids in the daycare, spitting at people, egging people on to have arguments...okay people do NOT argue with a 3 year old!...talking back, endlessly teasing his sister and taking her stuff away...it does not end there but I think you get the picture. I am being tested.
So yeah, this is kinda kicking my butt right now. He might be strong but I am stronger. What little man doesn't know is that I have walked this road before, with my youngest son who will soon be 19 years old...had he been my first child he would have been an only child...it wasn't pretty, but I persevered and came out on top. I survived and so did he...he turned out to be a great kid and now a very nice young man...it's just that going from point A to point B was extremely hard. There were times, like now, that I didn't think I was going to make it...literally. I cried many days and nights and questioned my parenting abilities just as I do now.
On one side, I look at my little man who is driving me completely crazy right now with his behaviors and yet continues to wrap his little arms around me countless times a day and tells me he loves me... on the other, I look at my son, who back in the day did the very same things, who now is this incredible, smart, hardworking, caring, kind, gentle young man who still hugs me and tells me he loves me every day...and then I am reminded that there is hope for a better day and that yes, I can be...must be strong and perservere to the end with my little man. I will pass this test...we both will.