It's 2 weeks today that I have gone without smoking! Yes, it's still crazy hard. And yes, I still crave cigarettes but I haven't given in to them. And no, I didn't think I would make it to this point...hell, I didn't think I was going to make it through the first day, let alone 14 whole days. I am facing my giants one day at a time.
This past weekend was my first big test. We had a couples shower for two of our good friends. I knew there would be lots of drinking and smoking. We couldn't miss it but part of me wanted to because deep down I thought I would be too weak to resist. At one point in the night, I wanted to smoke so badly that I went into the house to warm up and to take a break from being around it. I sat in the house and told myself all the reasons why I wasn't smoking...having to tell all of you that I smoked was one of the reasons I didn't. Knowing that I would have to start this whole hellish process over again is another reason I didn't. It was a long night but I made it.
Going into the weekend, everyone told me, that it would be okay if I gave in and had one. But, I know better. I know me. I know that one would never be enough. I know that one will lead me back to smoking.
I know I have a long ways to go before I'm in the clear. I know that I still have a lot of giants butts to kick. But, for today, I am proud of me. I am proud I have made it this far. And I have all of you to thank....so thank you, for supporting me and helping me to believe that I can do this. Seriously, you guys rock!