In our family...

In our family....we do second chances...we do grace...we do real...we do mistakes...we do I'm sorry (and I forgive you)...we do loud really well...we do hugs...we do family...we do love.















Wednesday, November 17, 2010

Messy Day’s Like This

This morning my grandson and little lady brushed my hair and “made me all pretty”. How I needed this pampering on this gray cold morning. Then I was crowned “princess Mommy of all the Mommy’s in the world”, so now I write with a princess crown on my head. How did I get so lucky?

It is my focus at present to be mindful of all that I have to be grateful & thankful for. I have a tendency to naturally lean in this direction largely due to the shoes I have walked in to get to where I am today. Still, I am human and that bent towards allowing negativity or tough moments to get the best of me, is ever present.

On day’s like this, when it’s hard to grab a whole 5 minutes at time to just think, write or read, in the midst of all the messes this day is presenting,  I forget to be thankful.

I have a dear friend that has been battling various health issues and after another fall last week, is in the hospital. As I’ve sat with her and looked into her eye’s I see such tiredness and a look that say’s “I am finished. I am ready to move on.” She is in her 80’s and has lived a full life. Yet, she continues to suffer, as does her family in watching her. She is growing weaker and more fragile each day. It seems that the end of her life may be soon.

As a friend it is difficult to see any good in all of this suffering. So instead I look to the beauty before me. This dear woman of beauty, grace and honorable character has taught me much just by watching her live and now she teaches me much about the end of life as well.

I see the love between her and her husband and one could only hope to have such a strong long love as this. I see the love between her and her daughter and the beauty of their relationship. The fact that they include me in their family and treat me as so, touches me beyond words. Tears prick my eye’s just writing this.

On Saturday I had the opportunity to bring her cards that my daughter and the little’s had made for her. To see the smile and delight upon her face as she looked at each one was priceless. My children and the little’s adore her as much as I do. The last time they seen her was Halloween when I brought them to show her their costumes and I don’t know who was happier her or them.

Today I am grateful with all of my heart, to know this woman and her family. They are amazing people and I will forever be grateful for the love they have shown me and my family. Even though it’s never easy to say goodbye to someone so special, I will be thankful when we are not seeing her suffer any longer.

I wrote about our big turkey that we have hanging on our wall in my last post. I had the little’s help me cut out colorful feathers and each day we write things we are thankful on them. Then we glue them onto the turkey. Our goal is to give our turkey as many beautiful thankful feathers as we can.

I think we are doing a pretty good job so far…

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We are thankful for things like…

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Mostly, we are really thankful for all the people that we love and that love us, so most of the feathers are filled with names.

In teaching the little’s to have a grateful attitude it not only  seems to add a layer of appreciation to the atmosphere of our home, it is a life lesson I want to drive home to them, not just during this month of Thanksgiving but every day of the year.

As you know parenting is an endless job and when the road gets long and weary I forget to be thankful for all of this. Some day’s, like today, parenting children is quite messy & noisy, and not pretty at all. There are day’s I don’t behave my best either so I suppose we’re pretty even.

I know there are some days it seems like they are just not getting these lessons I’m trying to teach them but I know some day they will. Some day’s when I am really tired, I ask myself, “Is it worth all this work you put in?” And then I look at my now grown kids and see the grateful, appreciative, responsible, hard working, honest,giving,  kind, caring and loving people that they are now and my heart screams “Yes!”

Yes it’s all worth it…the noise, the messes, the fighting, the giving and taking of chips(the chips system is going great!), the do over's, the patience, the kissing boo boo’s over and over again, the spills, the excitement over seeing a bug or the garbage truck, the stepping on crayons, the time spent in the better choice chair and trying to cook or bake with 3 extra pairs of hands “because I want to help too”…. so I will continue to be thankful for tough messy days like this, since it seems that some of the best lessons in life are learned in the messes we make. After all, I get to do all of this with a crown on my head.

Until next time, love & hugs, Lori

26 comments:

Brian Miller said...

your turkey is amazing! love all the little feathers and their words...and that lady sounds like a beautiful woman....

Debbie said...

Oh you are just the sweetest woman in the world!! I love the gratitude turkey!! What an amazing idea!! Hang in there....God has graced you and you know the old saying..."If God brought you to it, He'll see you through it!"

Busy Bee Suz said...

I am so sorry that your friend is not doing well. Prayers for her and the family.
I love the Thankful turkey, such a great idea. You (and I) are so blessed with a wonderful family...although I have NOT a crown to wear today!

We do a thankful tree each year at Thanksgiving and write on the leaves....but I can't find the tree this year, and I hope my girls did not hide it!!!!!

Elizabeth Grimes said...

I love this. You're so honest about the struggle of being blessed, yet still feeling the difficulty of every day life. It is a delicate balance. I need to write my blog to stay focused and it looks like you're doing great with the turkey idea! Thanks for your honesty, it helps!

Colleen said...

Lori, your writing always really touches me but this one even more so than usual. To read what you wrote about parenting just seemed to be what I needed to hear today. I love your thanksgiving turkey too and may steal that idea in the coming years. I feel strengthened and reinforced in my own desire to be a GOOD parent, the kind you are. To raise children like you described yours as and sometimes I just feel like I can't do it, won't be able to...but reading this helps so much.
I am so sorry about your precious friend. So much love being sent your way. God bless you.

Jeannie said...

I love your turkey!

Great idea. Makes me think I should have more kids just so I can use the idea. Just kidding. But maybe if I got to have a do over.

TechnoBabe said...

That is the best turkey ever. You are teaching your littles more than you can even imagine because you participate in the lessons.

Fragrant Liar said...

I love your turkey, and your good, loving heart. You are a joy to that sweet woman, I am sure. I hope she does well right up till the end.

xo

Joyce A Gray said...

Lori, I love your turkey. When I get to Az. I am going to make myself a gratitude Christmas tree. I miss my family a great deal during the holidays and I think it will be great to keep me mindful of my blessings.

Hilary said...

You deserve every inch of that crown.. and every gem, for that's exactly what you are. You're a gem, Lori and those Littles are so lucky and their lives enriched to have you as their parent.

May your turkey grow enormous with feathers of gratitude. I'm grateful that there are people like you in this world.

~Joy said...

What a neat idea! I showed it to the kids and we decided to make one too! We had so much fun working together to remind us of things we are thankful for.

Just Be Real said...

Very sweet Lori. Love the drawing. Thank you for sharing your pain here. Your transparency is rich. Sorry about your friend. Blessings.

Christina said...

im so glad you found the beauty...
and that turkey made me smile... no beam.
xo

LPC said...

Messy is the only reality. Kids want to know the spectrum. How we are at our best and how we are at our worst. You are doing such good work.

gaelikaa said...

Beautiful post, Lori. You are right, parenting is hard work. But the blessings are just endless!

Life with Kaishon said...

I love the turkey. Love! And I adore the grateful spirit you are instilling. What a treasure.

You teach me a lot about parenting. I'm thankful to know you.

I will keep your dear friend in my prayers.

slommler said...

To do all that you do with a crown on your head makes it all worth while for sure. For you are the Queen!!! And they love and appreciate you each and every day. It may not look like it some days...but they do...remember you have the crown!
Enjoy and I love your thankful turkey!
He is gorgeous!
Hugs
SueAnn

SciFi Dad said...

I really like that turkey idea. Thanks for sharing it.

Nessa said...

This was such a beautiful post and I needed it. A woman I know recently gave up on life on purpose. She felt there was nothing good left and yet she had so much and she couldn't see it. Such a contrast to your wonderful friend.

I think I am stealing your turkey idea for our Thanksgiving Day.

Buckeroomama said...

Thankfulness is something that I want my children to have. I really believe that the truly happy people are those who are thankful. One can never be truly happy without being thankful. :)

You gratitude turkey is just all kinds of awesomeness.

Pseudo said...

You are doing an amazing job.

Becca said...

What an absolutely wonderful, amazing post - thanks for the reminder and for your heart! :-)

And thanks for your sweet comment on my interview at Life with Kaishon - it totally made my day!

The Incredible Woody said...

That turkey is the best!!! I will be praying for your friend and her family.

jpooh said...

Yes, it IS all worth it, isn't it? :)

LOVE the turkey, too. What a lovely idea.

Jan

Natalie said...

Such a beautiful post, Lori. I understand the kid thing completely. :)
In regard to your friend,she does sound like a gift, but like attracts like, so you must be just as much a gift and a joy to her.xx♥

ladyfi said...

You are such an inspiration to us all! Parenting is tough, but it is worth it for all those little kisses and crowns!

That turkey is a marvellous idea: we should indeed learn to be thankful for every single day of life. It's a miracle, after all!