Writing his name

First of all, thank you for your kind supportive words to my last post. It’s an uncomfortable subject that I try to hide from but am learning that breaking the silence takes away it’s power. Both my daughter and I appreciate every kind word you sent us.

The most recent topic at our house is school…whether to send or not send to school. 

 Little man turned 5 this past May, which means he can start Kindergarten when school starts here, September 7th. We were not sure about sending him. Last year he had some struggles with small motor abilities such as holding a pencil correctly and having control over a scissors. His lack of interest combined with wanting to just play made us wonder if he is ready.

The other playing factor is that his sister is right behind him and holding him back would mean holding her back. She is not struggling with any of the issues her brother has and add to that her interest in these things and you have a whole different child. Because her birthday is in August, it could be that she may have the other issue of being emotionally immature to start a month later. I am not going to count on that though as she may very well be ready.

The last thing we want to do is push him to do something he is not ready for, just so his sister can start school next year.  I want him to like learning and not be turned off by it because his first experiences with structured learning are negative. Just as I don’t want to not send her if she is ready to go.

So we gave it the summer and decided we would visit this issue come mid-August. Or is this called procrastination?

Up until he went to preschool last year, he had no interest whatsoever in things to do with writing, coloring, cutting…ect. If I tried to make him, we would have a battle of wills. One or both of us would end up crying. So I stopped pushing it. And I just let him play.

When we went to his screening last September they told me that he did very poorly and would likely end up in special education. Now I have nothing against special education but I doubted that this is what he would need. I explained his lack of interest but also told them I wasn’t concerned because after all he was just 4 and given the opportunity to learn it, this little boy was smart and would learn it when he was ready. I don’t think they were very happy with me.

We came back home and I let him just play and I had a good cry. I was not going to fight with a 4 year old over something I know he will eventually learn.

I have provided endless amounts of blank paper, crayons, markers, pencils, paints, play dough, scissors, and the likes for the little’s to create with. I have printed out many a worksheets that encourage writing and all kinds of learning for all the little ones in this house. He being the oldest has little interest while the other 2 enjoy it and do rather well with it all.

I imagine how this must make him feel.

Last fall when he started attending Kindergarten readiness he began to show some interest but he still struggled. The poor little guy has worked very hard and experienced much frustration in attempting to use a pencil to write his name. His most favorite part of going was riding the bus and talking to everyone.

Of course it was, three of his favorite things are vehicles, talking and people. :)

The thing is, he is smart. He knows how to spell his name. He knows how to count, the abc’s, colors and shapes. He is very smart about many things because he is a great observer and has learned a lot by doing things hands on. Most important,(to me)is his kindness, politeness, sweetness, being very helpful, respectful and loving.

I have yet to meet a child that is his age that can carry on a conversation in person or on the phone as well as he does. Ask him to do a list of 5 chores and with a smile on his face he will do every single one, come back and ask if he can do something more for you.

Yet, he struggles to hold a pencil and write his name.

Since mid-August has come and after consulting with both my sister & daughter who are teachers and talking to 3 different people at the school, we have decided to send him.

He was very excited about going until he learned that I will not be going with him. My boy is so sweet to love me so.

I will have the next couple of weeks to prepare him and myself.

Am I still concerned? Yes, but I realize it might be because I am so protective of him and just want to make the right decision.

Is he truly ready? I hope so. We will soon see.

I know that if he’s really not ready it will show and we can always hold him back.

I know I keep saying this  but never in a thousand years did I think I would be preparing another child for school. Ever.

I’ve just realized that by the time little man & little lady graduate I will be in my early 60’s. Why do I feel like panicking right now?

Have you ever held back one of your children? To those of you in the field of education, do you have any advice for us? Have any of you ever struggled over the decision of whether to send or not send?

I know many of your schools are already started or starting this week. I hope your kids/grandkids have a wonderful year of learning.

Until next time, love & hugs, Lori